Big Day

The big day is coming and going so far without any additional news.

Today, I saw the agency personnel, the adoption facilitators, etc. at an awards luncheon at which my volunteer organization was honored with an award. They confirmed that they've heard nothing. Apologized.

One of the facilitators said she attended a conference yesterday and that they had cited new statistics that 80% of birthmothers change their mind and decide to parent their child. The original statistic I read was 50%, the agency said generally 60%, now 80%. This is the reason that we will pursue international options if this adoption doesn't happen. There's more expense and lots more paperwork, extensive travel, etc. but you're pretty much guaranteed to come home with a baby. We really cannot do this over and over. Emotionally, it would be exhausting and we would then age out of the few programs for which we're still eligible. I think, too, if we go to K-Country, as preliminarily planned, we'll have an incredible experience together as a couple and we'll be helping a child that otherwise may not have been adopted. That's probably not true of most domestically adopted newborns.

Who knows - that may be the better option - how do you like that today is the due date and I'm already moving on and justifying why the situation is really better in the alternative. Oh, me, of little faith.....

I don't really consider it a lack of faith, but perhaps I'm wrong. I think it's more of an acceptance, taken as the direction God must be pushing us in if this isn't it.